‘Ohana Stands Together

By Virginia Beck

Wow! What a long strange trip this has been!

I can no longer tell what news, entertainment or real life is. I have been watching and “old” series on Netflix, Madam Secretary. Last night’s episode and the morning news are the same. The Texas governor is lining the border with a steel wall of cars and vehicles, a mile long. Can this really be happening? Nations accusing each other, climate violence triggering panicked escapes.

Fear and anger; wild horses dragging the whole world in the worst direction.

This pandemic is dragging on and on. We are all tired, irritated, frustrated, and not able to get on with our lives the way we used to. And we don’t like it. Nerves are frayed, and despite so many good community actions and events, people are so ready to snap at each other.

Moms and teachers know that during bad weather when kids can’t get out, tempers will rise, then words and fists will fly about. Take six cats and throw them in a box with the lid on. They will scratch each other to death trying to get out.

The pressure on our nervous systems makes us tense and uncomfortable. We all have our strategies for managing ourselves during the day-to-day short-term stresses. But this has gone on so long. Not surprising that domestic violence and abuse increases. Thank goodness kids are going back to school, and more of the older kids are getting vaccinated.

It is amazing that our health care systems have held themselves together, short-staffed and working harder than ever. And the Department of Health, community volunteers and the countless hours of testing and vaccinating people. They all deserve a medal of honor.

As well as our Kaua‘i County administration and government leaders. Not to mention Ron Wiley, who is always the cheerful voice of Kaua‘i.

My friend talked about working in a facility run by a religious order, taking care of adolescents who were behaving badly and being rehabilitated. He shared that he never saw them getting angry with the rebellious youngsters. He heard one nun tell another, “Oh, so and so was extra hard to love today!” It landed in his heart. And mine. What a great way to respond.

Virginia Beck

Ho‘oponopono is a traditional part of Hawaiian values and practice. Gathering all involved and talking until everything is all talked out, no matter how long it takes. In the end, we find out we all had a part in whatever happened. We are a community.

No argument can stand up unless someone is pushing against it on the other side. So, what if we just take no sides, but stand in a circle that includes every one of us?

What if we are all just stuck in this tiny lifeboat in the middle of the ocean, and have to learn to get along?

I come from a highly verbal tribe, and have learned that. I never regret the angry things I never said. Aloha is always the perfect way, and the perfect word to begin and end each day.

• Virginia Beck, NP and Certified Trager® Practitioner, offers Wellness Consultation, Trager Psychophysical Integration and teaches Malama Birth Training classes. She can be reached at 635-5618.